You've had them, I've had them and hopefully you delete them. I'm talking about those scamming letters from some African dictatorship country pleading for assistance to liberate Millions of dollars from the country. What do you get from it - a percentage (normally about 10%) of the funds. Sounds too good to be true ? Well it is - wake up and smell the coffee.

This one comes to me from someone who shall remain nameless - lets call her M. M was someone who had the intelligence to query when something didn't sound quite right. Having heard her story and how far it had taken her down the path of potentially losing money had to take this one just to show that it was all indeed a scam but of course with no risk to M.

M - forwarded me the original email that she had been sent out of the blue as well as a couple of follow up emails showing the beginning of the path of destruction. I'll start from the beginning replying just to his email address - remember he hasn't sent me the email - I've just replied to his note that he sent M. Wouldn't you think that someone whose dealing with $8.5M would just be a little careful ? It appears not...

Original note from M.

DEAR FRIES

I am Barrister CHRIS DAVID a solicitor at law.I am the
personal attorney to late Mr HENS FRIES a national of your country, who was an
official contractor(category D)with SHELL PETROLEUM DEVELOPMENT COMPANY (SPDC)an oil firm in nigeria . Here in
after shall be referred to as my client.
On the 10th of april 2000, my client, his wife and their two only sons
were involved in a car accident along badagry express way. All
occupants of the vehicle unfortunately lost their lives. Since then I have made
several enquiries and presentations to locate any of my client's
extended relatives, this has also proved abortive.It is after these several
unsuccessful attempts to locate any member of his family failed that I
decided to contact you since coincidentally you have your last name as FRIES believing that you can invariably be of help in this situation to
stands as the next of kin to this my client.
I am con tacting you to assist in repatriating the money and property
left behind by my client before they get confiscated or declared
unserviceable by the Nigerian Reserve bank where this huge deposit were
lodged.
Already, the finance company where the deceased had an account valued
at about US$8.5 million dollars has issued me a notice/ultimatum to
provide the next of kin or have the account confiscated within the next
one Month. Since It has been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for
over 3 years now, I seek your consent to present you as the next of kin
of the deceased , so that the proceeds of this account valued at
US$8.5 million dollars can be paid to your account and there after we can
share the fund (money)in the ratio of 7:3. That is, I will have 70% of
the proceed while you have 30% for for your assistance.
I have all necessary legal documents that can be used to back up any
claim we may make. All I require is your honest co-operation to enable us
see this transaction through .I guarantee that this will be executed
under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of
the law.
Please get in touch with me by my email and send to me your telephone
and fax numbers to enable us discuss further about this transaction.
Best regards,
CHRIS DAVID

I don't know if M's last name is Fries - I doubt it very much... Just a blanket email out to everyone..

Chris,

Sorry for not responding sooner, I’ve been away on vacation and only just picked up your email.

I’d certainly like to help you out but am unsure what exactly I’m supposed to do for you.

I can be reached on this email, and can also be reached on +44 xxxxxxxx. I think this number is correct for the UK.

Hear from your shortly..

Regards

Lister

Sunday 15th Aug

Dear Lister,

Thank you very much for your reply to my business proposal. It is my
delight to express happiness and readiness to work with you as a partner in this
collective and mutual understanding if you would be ready to work with me to
secure the fund. Please note that it does not really matter at this time if you
are true relative of Late Mr. HENS
What matters is your interest, ability and most importantly mutual
agreement and understanding between you and I to work together for the
success of the transaction.

We shall have honesty and trust as the first consideration in what ever
shall go on between us. I shall need a total assurance that you will
not by any means sit or divert the money as soon as it is confirmed in
your custody, without releasing my share to me.Please take your time to
study this letter and ask me questions if there are any.

Before, I continue however, I would like to give you more information
about myself. My full names are chris davids, Born on the 14th
of February 1955. I am a legal practitioner, married with 2 children. My office
address is No: 12 Elias Close, 5th Floor, Victoria Island Annex, Lagos Nigeria.


Note however that we are going to follow all the led down
Inheritance regulations of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. So we are
going through it legally.

To move further in this transaction, I shall need the following from
you.

1) Your full name.
2) Your full address
3) An assurance that you will release my share of the money.
4) Detail information about yourself (Resume). This information is
very important as it will help me to make sure that your relationship
with HENS (acclaimed) agrees.

As soon as these are received here, I shall immediately inform the bank
by way of a formal letter for the claim of the fund in your favor and
upon approvals, the bank will inform you to that effect.

I shall give you more specific instructions as we proceed and always
carry you along the process. And you must inform me as soon as you
receive any message from the bank and any correspondence you might have with
them. It is very important you do this so as to enable me instruct you properly
to avoid any mistake from your side.

Furthermore, it is also very important you note the confidentiality of
this transaction. It might not be to our mutual interest if you go
talking and jeopardize the process.PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CALL 234-8xxxxxxxx

Yours Sincerely,
barrister chris davids

Well it seems he doesn't care if my last name is or is not Fries...

A resume - ooo have to dream one up..

Well he's in Lagos, even got a Nigerian Mobile number..

Sunday 15th August..

Chris,

By chance I’m picking up my works email today and your email.

Due to the nature of confidentiality I’d like to keep this away from my works email address so will send you an email from my personal account so we can communicate securely as I use a secure email service which encrypts the email prior to sending. You may want to consider using it as it’s a great service – and you get free webspace and unlimited storage on their servers.

To answer your request – my Name is Lister Rimmer, I’m 41, married with one child. My address is 43 Kingsway Avenue, London. WC2A 3EB.

What kind of personal information do you need from me in a resume. I don’t have one typed up as I’m currently not considering changing jobs.

I will not talk to anyone regarding this…

I await your reply…

Regards

Lister

You'll see the use of this later - hopefully.

I JUST CALLED IT WAS THROUGH ,BUT WAS ON VOICE MAIL, I COULDNT SAY ANYTHING.

IT WOULD BE WAITING FOR YOUR REPLY OR CALL 234-8xxxxxxxxxx

Sunday evening and I get an voicemail message from him, saying to call him back - funnily enough exactly what he said in his email.

Monday 16th August

Chris,

Thanks for your email, it looks like you called on Sunday which would explain why I couldn’t answer – I was away for the weekend only briefly returning home to collect some things. I’ll try and give you a call tonight – I’m currently at work so can’t use their telephone to make the call – I’ll try and call you tonight – what’s the time difference between us ? I don’t want to call you during the middle of the night. !

I’d also recommend that you consider using www.xxxxxxxxxx for security. It works great but you need a referrer code to have an account setup on it due to it’s popularity. If you wish – you can use mine - Referrer code – xxxx. I know that they’ve been swamped with requests due to the popularity of the service but it works great.

Hopefully talk to you tonight….

Regards

Lister

More of this hopefully later...

Monday evening :

Email Title : INFORMATION OF THE DECEASED

A. FULL INFORMATION OF THE DECEASED
1. Full name: hens rimmer
2. Country of Birth ; america
3. Residential Address in Nigeria : Zonaz A1, NO : 5 Crecent Victoria Garden City, Lagos. Nigeia
4. Age ; 45years
5. Occupation ; oil rig contractor
6. Marital Status ; Married with two children all deceased
7. Cause of Death ; Car accident
8. Date of Occurence 10th may 2000
9. Country / Area of Death ; Nigeria / Alongbadagry express way

B. FULL BANKING INFORMATION OF THE DECEASED :
1. Banking Account Description ; domiciliary account
2. Bank Account Number ; 456 243 0069
3. Last Updated ; 05- 09- 1999
4. Banking Security Policy Code No ; 43331013750000
5. Saving Number ; 000 343 5252
6. Total Available Credit Fund ; $8.5 [ Million u.s dollars

I WILL PROVIDE THE DEATH CERTIFICATE AND THE CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT SOONEST,AFTER I SCAN THE CERTIFICATES.

So he's changed his name from Hens Fries to Hens Rimmer has he - oh yes, that will please the bank manager.

That expressway is such a dangerous place.

Look at all that dosh in the bank account - must be real

Chris,

Thank my cotton socks that you’ve responded. You haven’t answered my original question about the timezones between us. I’m afraid that if I call you at a strange time of the day that you’ll be offended not having spoke to you before.

Thank you for your details about the deceased, do you have any more information on how he died – I know it says car accident but what was the cause of death ? I’m curious this way.

What exactly is that you want me to do with this information and the documents that you’ll send me. My eyesight gets strained so please send them as large as you can to stop me straining my eyes. I normally have to type these notes in font size 20 then convert it to 10 or 12 so others can read it easily so the larger and sharper the image the better.

Looking forward to hearing from you. Did you get signed up with xxxxxx ?

Regards
Lister

The larger the size of the image that he sends me the more chance we'll have of seeing how fake the document is..I feel some fun coming on with font sizes..

I WOULD WANT YOU TO APPLY TO THE BANK IMMEDIATELY FOR THE TRANSACTION TIO GET STARTED IMMEDIATELY PLEASE DO THAT AS SOON AS YOU DO THAT CALL 234-8xxxxxxxxxxx.
REMEMBER WHAT EVER THE BANK TRELLS YOU TO DO YOU TELL ME SO I WIIL INFORM YOU ON WHAT TO DO TO AVOID ANY MISTAKE FROM YOUR SIDE.
THANKS,
BARRISTER CHRIS DAVIDS

TO THE MANAGING DIRECTOR,
REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT,
STANDARDTRUSTBANK PLC,
PLOT 1662,OYIN JOLAYEMI STREET
VICTORIA ISLAND LAGOS.

Dear Sir,
APPLICATION FOR REPATRIATION OF MY LATE UNCLES FUND(HENS POTTER)

I hereby apply for the inheritance of my late uncles deposit ,with REFERENCE CODE BA0581380660001. belonging to late Engineer HENS RIMMER,who died in a gastly motor accident a on the 10th of may 2000. I am the next of kin to above aforementioned name and the beneficiary of the project fund which account number is stated.
I will in due time forward to your office on how and where I want the fund to be transferred, I will be obliged if this application is granted and I am also thanking you for your anticipated co-operation.

FIRST NAME..............

LAST NAME................

TEL NO.................

FAX NO.................

ADDRESS NO..................

MAILING ADDRESS..............

Yours faithfully,
................
sign

APPLY TO THE BANK VIA EMAIL ADDRESS : (xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx )

He would want me to apply immediately wouldn't he. The sooner I apply, the sooner he'll get his money..

If you note the name - it's now Hens Potter.. Obviously a lot of scams going on..

Tuesday evening

TO THE MANAGING DIRECTOR,
REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT,
STANDARDTRUSTBANK PLC,
PLOT 1662,OYIN JOLAYEMI STREET
VICTORIA ISLAND LAGOS.

Dear Sir,

APPLICATION FOR REPATRIATION OF MY LATE UNCLES FUND(HENS POTTER)

I hereby apply for the inheritance of my late uncles deposit ,with REFERENCE CODE BA0581380660001. belonging to late Engineer HENS RIMMER,who died in a gastly motor accident a on the 10th of may 2000. I am the next of kin to above aforementioned name and the beneficiary of the project fund which account number is stated.
I will in due time forward to your office on how and where I want the fund to be transferred, I will be obliged if this application is granted and I am also thanking you for your anticipated co-operation.

FIRST NAME.............. Lister

LAST NAME................ Rimmer

TEL NO................. +44 xxxxxxxxxx

FAX NO................. Not available

ADDRESS NO.................. 43 Kingsway Avenue, London. WC2A 3EB

MAILING ADDRESS..............As above

Yours faithfully,

L. Rimmer

Lister Rimmer

Wednesday..

ATTENTION;LISTER RIMMER
THE STANDARD TRUST BANK HAS GONE THROUGH YOUR DECEASED(HEN POTTER RIMMER) PROFILE,AND FOUND OUT THAT THERE IS AN EXISTING REFERENCE CODE( BA0581380660001)WITH
THAT NAME,YOUR ABOVE INFORMATION YOU SENT TO US,WILL HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE FOLLOWING PROCESS OF AUTHENTIFICATION AND VERIFICATION.
NOW WE WOULD LIKE YOU TO PROVIDE US WITH THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION ABOUT YOU.

1)AN INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT PICTURE OR DRIVERS LICENSE WITH YOUR PICTURE,THIS IS FOR IDENTIFICATION PURPOSE
2)BENEFICIARYS BANK ACCOUNT IN YOUR COUNTRY,THE ADDRESS OF THE BANK.
3)YOUR HOME ADDRESS,WORKING AND MARRITAL STATUS.
THE FOLLOWING DETAILS ARE TO BE PROVIDED TO THIS BANK FOR TRANSFER PROCESS TO COMMENCE.
THANKS
REMITTANCE OPERATION MANAGER
DR BELLO AHMED

===============

ATTN. MR RIMMER
HERE IS AN ATTACHED CLAIMANT FORM WHICH IS TO BE FILLED AND SUBMITTED TO THE BANK, AFTER WHICH AUTHENTICATION AND VERIFICATION WOULD BE CARRIED OUT FOR THE TRANSFER PROCESS OF YOUR FUND TO COMMENCE BY THE REMMITTANCE OPERATION DEPARTMENT.
THANKS,
ADEKUNLE JONES(FOR LEGAL DEPARTMENT)

They've attached an HTML file which I print off, fill in and send back to them along with my passport.

Ooo two emails from the bank..

Of which they've conviently changed my deceased friends name to be Hen Potter Rimmer

Wednesday evening

Bello,

Firstly is there any chance you can type in lower case characters – the UPPER case typing is doing my head in and giving me a migrane headache, so much so that I had to go and sit down for about twenty minutes after reading your email. Stop it – it’s not smart and it’s not what I’d expect from a bank.

In response to your requests – I’ve attached my passport scanned in as requested, I’ve also attached a form sent out by your bank legal department. Why send out two emails when one will do ? Can’t your bank get things organized. Considering this is my first communication and correspondence with your may I tell you so far I’m not impressed with your level of standard. For example, I had some queries on the form and do I have a telephone number to contact the bank on – NO – another example of the lack of customer service so far from Standard trust. I hope for your sake the service improves.

If there any queries on the attached, please let me know…

Regards
Lister

I hate people who type in UPPER case all the time. Idiots.

Do you think the uniform suits me ?

Thurs 19th August

Sorry for the delay to the response to your mail i have been out of office.
Concerning the scanning of the document i will make sure i do that before tommorow,i will make sure i get the death certificate scanned and deposit certificate.
I WILL GIVE YOU A CALL

=================

Sorry for the delay in response to your letter i have been out of office.
Concerning the documents i will be sending the death certificate tommorow.
I will give you a call .
thanks ,
barrister chris davids

and then twenty minutes later..

The text came in that way..

STANDARDTRUSTBANK PLC,
PLOT 1662,OYIN JOLAYEMI STREET
VICTORIA ISLAND LAGOS.
TELL-234-8xxxxxxxxxxx

DEAR LISTER RIMMER,

WE JUST WANT TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOU THAT WE RECEIVED YOUR MAIL.YOUR INFORMATION HAS BEEN SCRUTINIZED ORDERLY AND HAS GONE THROUGH THE NORMAL BANKING INVESTIGATION. WE ARE PLEASED WITH THE INFOMATION YOU PROVIDED NOW SATIFIED THAT YOU ARE THE TRUE NEXT OF KIN.
BEFORE WE COMMENCE ON PROCESSING THE TRANSFER OF YOUR FUND TO YOUR NORMINATED ACCOUNT YOU SHOULD PROVIDE US WITH THE FOLLOWING DOCUMENTS BY COMING PERSONALLY TO OUR BANK,YOUR REPRESENTATIVE CAN ONLY BE YOUR LATE COUSIN ATTORNEY, WHO CAN GET YOU THIS DOCUMENTS HERE IN NIGERIA, BECAUSE WE CANNOT CARRY OUT THIS ON OUR OWN WITHOUT YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEY BEEN INFORMED. WE WANT A GENERAL CONSENSUS AMONGST YOU,AND WE THE BANK. YOU`RE TO CONTACT YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEY FOR THE LEGAL OPERATION OF YOUR FUND RELEASE. IN ACCORDANCE TO THE STANDARDTRUSTBANK REGULATION AND POLICY , SUCH FUND RELEASE COULD ONLY BE COMMENCE LAWFULLY WITH THE NOTIFICATION , AWARENESS AND CONSENT OF YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEY,AND HE IS THE ONLY ATTORNEY WHO CAN STAND ON YOUR BEHALF TO PROVIDE THE DOCUMENTS LISTED BELOW AND TO SIGN THE NECESSARY DOCUMENS BEFORE WE CAN TRANSFER YOUR FUND TO YOU.

BELOW ARE THE DOCUMENTS AND YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEYS FULL NAME,CONTACT ADDRESS AND E-MAIL ADDRESS

1)DEATH CETIFICATE
2)A SWORN AFFIDAVIT FROM THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT OF NIGERIA
3)ADMINISTRATION FEE 0F US$700
4)LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION.
THE ADMINISTRATIN FEE SHOULD BE PAID TO THE BANKS TREASURER OBINNA RICHARD PETERS, VIA WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER,FOR THE IMMEDIATE COMMENCEMENT OF THE TRANSFER PROCESS

DR BELLO AHMED

Oh oh, the bank is still typing in upper case characters... I feel a reprimand coming on...

There is no email address or contact details attached below.

Saturday Morning

Bello,

Firstly thank you for you email which has only gone and clouded what I thought would be a straight forward process of you giving me the money.

Secondly, your banks response to it’s potential customers is abysmal – I’m convinved I asked you not to send me any more emails typed fully in upper case as it gives me a severe migrane. Stop it. Look at your keyboard, theres a key on the left marked CAPS LOCK. Press it – and now type something – you’ll find amazingly enough that the letters change into lower case. Use that instead. I expect more from a bank than just a place to put my hard earned money, I expect them to listen to me and adapt as required when customers are not happy about something. Unless of course you’re just a run of the mill blood sucking leech of a bank ?

Thirdly – in your email, you mention contact details for an attorney however your incompetence has meant that you’ve forgotten to include them. Please provide them by return (remember in lower case !!)

I query the administration fees that are involved in this. You’re a bank, you make your money on the pitiful interest that you give your customers. I’d like to know what interest this account is currently making. I’ve never worked with a bank that has charged me “administration fees” – how do I know that you’re an efficient bank and that these fees are correct. Sounds like just another way to get more money from the customers (remember my comment about blood sucking leeches ?)

Please clarify exactly what these fees are for and why this amount cannot be deducted from the interest on the account.

I look forward to hearing your answers to the above questions. Remember - lower case..

Regards
Lister

Saturday Morning

I called you number it was not going through was the problem . please could you call me?
i have been in seach of the death certificate just found it. I am soory for the delay in getting the
certificate scannened i want to hear from you.As soon as the bank replies you donn forget to pass the info to,as to knoew what to do next.
barrister chris david

Well he's quick at responding.

Saturday Morning

Chris,

Thank you for your email - I picked up your messages you left on the answering machines - we've had a busy social life and hence have been out and about all the time - only returning home to sleep.

I've been in contact with the bank and they've sent me this :
=================
DEAR LISTER RIMMER,

WE JUST WANT TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOU THAT WE RECEIVED YOUR MAIL.YOUR INFORMATION HAS BEEN SCRUTINIZED ORDERLY AND HAS GONE THROUGH THE NORMAL BANKING INVESTIGATION. WE ARE PLEASED WITH THE INFOMATION YOU PROVIDED NOW SATIFIED THAT YOU ARE THE TRUE NEXT OF KIN.
BEFORE WE COMMENCE ON PROCESSING THE TRANSFER OF YOUR FUND TO YOUR NORMINATED ACCOUNT YOU SHOULD PROVIDE US WITH THE FOLLOWING DOCUMENTS BY COMING PERSONALLY TO OUR BANK,YOUR REPRESENTATIVE CAN ONLY BE YOUR LATE COUSIN ATTORNEY, WHO CAN GET YOU THIS DOCUMENTS HERE IN NIGERIA, BECAUSE WE CANNOT CARRY OUT THIS ON OUR OWN WITHOUT YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEY BEEN INFORMED. WE WANT A GENERAL CONSENSUS AMONGST YOU,AND WE THE BANK. YOU`RE TO CONTACT YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEY FOR THE LEGAL OPERATION OF YOUR FUND RELEASE. IN ACCORDANCE TO THE STANDARDTRUSTBANK REGULATION AND POLICY , SUCH FUND RELEASE COULD ONLY BE COMMENCE LAWFULLY WITH THE NOTIFICATION , AWARENESS AND CONSENT OF YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEY,AND HE IS THE ONLY ATTORNEY WHO CAN STAND ON YOUR BEHALF TO PROVIDE THE DOCUMENTS LISTED BELOW AND TO SIGN THE NECESSARY DOCUMENS BEFORE WE CAN TRANSFER YOUR FUND TO YOU.

BELOW ARE THE DOCUMENTS AND YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEYS FULL NAME,CONTACT ADDRESS AND E-MAIL ADDRESS

1)DEATH CETIFICATE
2)A SWORN AFFIDAVIT FROM THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT OF NIGERIA
3)ADMINISTRATION FEE 0F US$700
4)LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION.
THE ADMINISTRATIN FEE SHOULD BE PAID TO THE BANKS TREASURER OBINNA RICHARD PETERS, VIA WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER,FOR THE IMMEDIATE COMMENCEMENT OF THE TRANSFER PROCESS
=============================

As you can see the documents you've promised are key in this transaction.

Please get them to me at the earliest opportunity.

I'm a bit wary about the administration fee that they mention, infact the banks approach has been somewhat shoddy. They never seem to listen to things that their customer is telling them. I'll happily pay the fee but am wary and need to have my confidence in this transaction lifted before proceeding.

I tried to call you this morning but I got a message saying that 'were unable to reach the number your calling'. I'm out today with our local football team all weekend so won't be in to receive any calls.

I realized that I've never actually spoken to you, let alone know what you look like. So I don't know you from Jack. I realize that I've sent my passport photo so you know what I look like. Can you send me a photo of yourself so I know who I'm dealing with. Just to prove who I'm dealing with can you get a photograph taken with you holdling our football teams logo - This will give me the confidence that all is well. We've used this logo elsewhere so it should print off onto an A4 sheet easily.

I look forward to your picture and the death certificate.

Thanks in advance..
Lister

I've used the logo of a privateers Rally Team that I'm helping out in October. Have a look... Team Saluki

Monday 23rd August

Bello,

I thought I would have heard from you today but alas no email. I was thinking about coming to Nigeria to get this all sorted out – do you think that would be a wise decision. I’ve got next week off on holiday so if I travel at the weekend I can be there on Monday morning to conclude the business – your comments would be appreciated.

Regards

Lister

Chasing up the bank...

I'm actually going to Lagos on Sunday on business so thought I might try an have some fun with them whilst I was there.

Tues 24th August

STANDARDTRUSTBANK PLC,
PLOT 1662,OYIN JOLAYEMI STREET
VICTORIA ISLAND LAGOS.
TELL-xxxxxxxxxxx

Dear rimmer
The harrasment the bank has gotten from you is out of hand and we cant continue to take any such insult from you .
Regards the comming to nigeria will be better as to convience the bank,,that truely you are the next of kin to the deceased. that you are the true next of kin.,but your late cousins lawyer which they told you to contact have you done that?if you have not done that you better do that and pay up the administration fee,for the transfer process to begin.

Ahmed Bello

Insults, they call that insults..

STANDARDTRUSTBANK PLC,
PLOT 1662,OYIN JOLAYEMI STREET
VICTORIA ISLAND LAGOS.
TELL-xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

DEAR RIMMER,
THE HARRASMENT THE BANK IS GETTING FROM YOU IS MUCH ,AND I DONT THINK ANY ONE IS WILLING TO LISTING TO YOUR SILLY EXCUSES I MUST SAY SO.
REGARDS YOUR COMMING TO NIGERIA I THINK IT WILL BE THE BEST BECAUSE THE FUND APPROVAL WILL BE MADE EASY ON YOUR ARRIVAL TO CLAIM YOUR LATE COUSINS FUND.AS YOU STATED YOU ARE FREE TO DO THAT DURING THIS LEAVE YOU HAVE GOTTEN .
I SUGGEST YOU PAY THE MONEY FOR THE ADMINISTATION FEE,SO TRANFER OF THE FUND COULD COMMENCE.
AHMED BELLO

But also at the same time I get one that is all in upper case... They've obviously figured out where the convert function is in their word processor software is. Well done boys..

Ahmed,

Thank you for your email : I do not understand what you mean by harassment – I’ve been civil in all my communications requesting a service from the bank, I pointed out a couple of things that irritated me, once of which I see you’ve managed to find the CAPS LOCK key. It certainly makes reading the emails easier.

You’ve still forgotten to attached my cousins attorneys details as specified in your earlier email. Please advise soonest.

I’ve checked with British Airways and I can get a flight for a reasonable price to Lagos this Sunday evening arriving Monday morning do you think this would be worthwhile to clear the transaction up. I can bring the fee and also be prepared for any other expenses that would be associated with the transaction. Can you advise what other fees may be payable.

Thanks in advance –

Lister

Wednesday 25th August

DEAR RIMMER
I AM SORRY FOR THE DELAY IN WRITING YOU IT WAS
DUE TO INCOVENIENCES.I GAVE YOU A CALL YOU WERE NOT AVAILABLE,THE PHONE WAS ON VOICE MAIL SO I DROPED WHAT I FELT WAS NOT A FULL DETAILED INFORMATION.
AS I DISCUSED WITH YOU CONCERNING THE SWORN AFFIDAVIT OF CLAIM FROM THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT ,AND LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION.
I WILL BE LEAVING FOR ABUJA TOMMOROW MORNING TO MAKE SURE I GET THE SWORN AFFIDAVIT OF CLAIM,AND THE LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION.
THIS WILL COST ME MONEY ,BUT I WILL BE TAKING CARE OF THE EXPENSES ,AND ALL IT COST TO GET THE SWORN AFFIDAVIT OF CLAIMS.
I HAVE ORDERED THAT THE DEATH CERTIFICATE SHOUD BE SENT OT YOU IMMEDIATELY BY MY SECETARY,AS SOON AS THIS DEATH CERTIFICATE IS SENT TO YOU SEND IT TO THE BANK TELLING THEM THAT YOUR ATTORNEY HAS GONE TO THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT ABUJA TO GET THE SWORN AFFIDAVIT OF
CLAIM AND THE LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION AS REQUESTED.
AS SOON AS YOU SUBMITT THE DEATH CERTIFICATE MAKE SURE YOU PAY (THE ADMINISTRATION FEE)FOR THIS TRANSACTION TO BE ON THE FAST PACE.IF THE BANK SHOULD REQUEST FOR THE PROVISION OF THE SWORN AFFIDAVIT OF
CLAIM AND THE LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION YOU TELL THEM THAT YOUR ATTORNEY HAS GONE TO THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT TO GET THESE DOCUMENT AS REQUESTED .
DURING OUR DISCUSSION THIS MORNING I HEARD YOU MADE MENTION OF COMMING TO NIGERIA CONCERNING THE TRANSFER OF YOUR FUND.I FELL THIS IS NOT THE APPROPRIATE FOR YOUR ARRIVAL.AS I YOUR LATE COUSINS ATTORNEY CAN TAKE CARE OF THIS TRANSACTION ON THIS SIDE.
REGARDS,
BARRISTER CHRIS DAVID

I'm never available on that number.

Wed 25th August

DEAR RIMMER,
I HAVE ATTACHED THE DEATH CERTIFICATE, WHICH IS TO
BE SUBMITTED TO THE BANK IMMEDIATELY SO THAT THEY CAN
START THE TRANSFER PROCESS. TELL THEM THAT YOUR
ATTORNEY HAS GONE TO THE FEDERAL HIGH COURT ABUJA FOR
THE DOCUMENTS REQUESTED, AS SOON AS THE ATTORNEY
RETURNS THE DOCUMENTS REQUESTED WOULD BE PROVIDED.
YOU CAN GO AHEAD TO PAY THE ADMINISTRATION FEE,
TELL THE BANK TO COMMENCE THE PROCESS IMMEDIATELY.
I HAVE SHEDULED MY FLEIGHT BY 9AM TO THE
CAPITAL CITY ABUJA, FOR THE REQUESTED DOCUMENTS.
BARRISTER CHRIS DAVID

Is it just me, or does this death certificate look like a three year old has written it with their first use of a Biro pen ?

Looks like they don't which day he died on - a closer inspection of the date reveals that underneath the 10th, is the 12th..

Nice stamp though..!

Wed 25th August
Ahmed,

Find enclosed the death certificate as requested. My attorney has gone to the federal high court Abuja for the other documents. I will be arranging the payment today and will send an email once complete.

Regards

Lister

Chris,

Thanks for that - I've forwarded to the bank and advised I'll be making payment shortly.

We spoke on the phone yesterday about photos of each other and I realized that I've not got a photograph of you. I'm out with a local football club for the next couple of days and would like you do to the following as it would both satisfy me and also please the under 11 football team that I'm away with. Can you send a photograph of you holding the team logo - I did send this previously but think it may have got lost when your email was playing up.
It should print out straight onto an A4 sheet of paper - infact - if you could print off several and get some of your friends to hold them it would be a great moral boost for the young boys seeing a group of Africans supporting their team.

Thanks in advance.

I'm still trying to get Mr Muppet to hold my Team Saluki sign

Thursday 26th August

I WANT TO APPRECIATE YOUR EFFORT.IT SEEMS TO ME YOU ARE ALWAYS BUSY.THERE IS NEVER A TIME I CALLED AND GOT YOU ON THE PHONE ,ANY CALL I MAKE THE VOICE MAIL IS ALWAYS ON .

I AM IN RECEIPT OF YOUR MAIL I WILL DISCUSS THAT WITH MY WIFE WHEN AM BACK FROM ABUJA. I COULD NOT DO THAT YESTERDAY ,DUE TO MY LATE ARRIVAL TO ABUJA.

TODAY BEING THURSDAY WE ARE OBSERVING A PUBLIC HOLIDAY..
PLEASE GIVE ME A CALL..

oh dear oh dear...

Friday 27th August

Chris,

Apologies for not being there whilst you called. I’m generally out and about on the factory floor away from my desk which makes contacting me a question of chance if I happen to be by my desk.

Whilst on the voice mail – is there any chance you can speak clearer – as I don’t know if you are talking with the phone in your mouth but I think the distortion sounds like it is. Perhaps the handset needs to be slightly further away from your mouth. The message sounds like it’s garbage – the only bit I did manage to get was Chris David at the end.

I had some discussions with the bank and they suggested that coming to Nigeria would be a good idea next week – would this work for you ?

I’ll try to call you this afternoon.

Regards

Lister

It's at this point that I had to go away for a couple of weeks to various places on Business - including Lagos - home of the scams. Access to email was limited and I didn't really have time to pursue this which is a pity so I had to make an effort upon my return to chase them up.

28/08.04

DEAR RIMMER,
I AM IN RECIEPT OF YOUR MAIL ,I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE REQUESTING,BUT THE ISSUE IS THIS .WHY SHOULD I SNAP A PHOTO THAT I DONT UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF THE LOGO?,AND WOULD WANT TO KNOW THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE LOGO? .
YOU ARE VERY CORRECT TO ASK SUCH QUESTION OF KNOWING WHOM YOU ARE DEALING WITH,AM AFRAID OF THE LOGO.YOUR COMING TO NIGERIA WILL BE WHEN THE NEED ARISES FOR YOU TO SIGN IMPORTANT DOCUMENTS .
I WILL BE THROUGH WITH THE FEDERAL HIGH COUGHT TODAY ,MY ARRIVAL WILL BE ON SUNDAY.I DID NOT RECEIVE ANY CALL FROM YOU AS YOU STATED IN YOUR MAIL.I WOULD WANT TO SPEAK WITH YOU.
BARRISTER CHRIS DAVID

30th August

Dear Rimmer,
After the discussion with my wife concerning the photo,and she disagreed because of the animalistic drawing.
Viewing your point from the other perspective,I decided to do it in other to make sure that there is self trust within both parties.
The sworn affidavit of claim, and the letter of administration. I submitted them to the bank this morning, to commence on the transfer process.
I would want to know if you have paid the administration fee to the bank,so they can commence the transfer process.
Attached is my photo with the logo as requested. Please give me a call today.

Barrister Chris David.

Well he looks a happy camper - not. Looks like the picture is taken in his church. Not exactly a great picture though.

Chris,

Thank you for your note, and the picture – it’s a little grainy but I’ll show it to the team today and I’m sure they’ll be over the moon with it.

Is that your church that you’re in ? I never knew you were a religious person.

Have you had any joy in scanning the documents…

Regards

Lister

14th September

Hello,
If you are not serious about this let me know.It has been long i recieved your mail,you dont call,whenever i call it is always on voice mail. I cant really understand.
Barrister chris

This is the problem of trying to keep this going whilst travelling about...

16th September

Chris,

My god, its been ages since I’ve heard from you – I thought something had happened to you. I’ve been trying to call you but it seems international calls from our offices are having problems and not being routed correctly or something like that the engineers had told us. They say it’s fixed not and it does take the call longer to go through but still no connection to your phone.

I was concerned for you since you’ve not been incontact – I thought I had done something to offend you.

Can we schedule a time say tomorrow for me to call you. The last I heard from the bank was that It would be worthwhile if I traveled to Nigeria to complete the transaction, you say this was not a good idea. Which one do you suggest I should proceed with ?

Perhaps we can talk about it tomorrow..

Thanks in advance..

May god go with you..

Lister

Rimmer,
I don't really understand what you mean by the bank not replying you.
have you sent the documents required by the bank,which i sent to you,please understand that as it is now i cant just start going to the bank,so try tell them that they should be more effective to their customers.Tell the bank to tell you the position of the transfer process,and what is causing their delay in not replying you.

Can you advise on the status of this transfer – I haven’t heard anything recently and wonder what you’re waiting on.

Thanks in advance..

Lister

Mr.Lister

Try to give me a call today.Please note that you are to notify me on whatever the bank instructs you to do,so as to avoid any mistake.
Attached is the letter of administration.Drop a reachable phone number,so i can give a call.
Regars,
Barrister Chris David

Link to Affadivit letter (155Kb)

Dear Rimmer,
I was away for a week, that was why i could not reach you.Attached is the sworn affidavit of claim ,and the letter of administration as required by the bank.Please as soon as you do the submission you are to inform me.I called your number on saturday could
not get you, the phone was on voice mail.
Barrister Chris David

I also get a second note from him detailing..

I do love the way the round official stamp seal is actually overlayed on the name. Images are square unless they've been edited...If only they had not cut and pasted the document together..

16th September

Ahmed,

Can you advise on the status of this transfer – I haven’t heard anything recently and wonder what you’re waiting on.

Thanks in advance..

Lister

A chase up note to the bank..

20th September 2004

Sir,
The status is still the same. The bank requested for the following:
1. SWORN AFFIDAFIT OF CLAIM
2. LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION
3. ADMINISTRATION FEE OF $700.

This are to be submitted to the bank for the transfer to commence.

Thanks
Dr. Ahmed Bello

I've got the two out of three, looks like I need to start involving Western Union.

Chris,

I’ve just tried to call both you and the bank without success – I don’t know if there is a problem on the international links.. I was trying to chase the bank to see what the status of the transfer is as the last communication I heard from them was the 24th of August. Do you know if the banks in Nigeria are normally this slow..

Regards

Lister

I want to Know the Status of the transaction.Still the same?

Barrister Chris

Sorry – I had to go away for a couple of days only returning late last night. I contacted the bank and they said that they were waiting on three things..

SWORN AFFIDAFIT OF CLAIM
2. LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION
3. ADMINISTRATION FEE OF $700.

I’ve now got the first two and this morning I’ve been down to my bank to get the $700 from the foreign currency desk. I hope to get to a Western Union office this afternoon – the nearest one is about 10 miles away. They want it transferred by western union. I’ve never used them before and prefer bank transfers so I don’t know what to expect.

I’ll let you know

Regards

Lister

24th September

Chris,

I’ve just sent them the documents and have as mentioned earlier transferred the money to Western union – a lot of form filling but it’s been done.

I await their reply..

Regards

Lister

Friday 24 September 14:26

Ahmed,

Find attached the affidavit, and letter of administration as requested..

I’ve also visited the Western Union and transferred the $700 for the treasurer - OBINNA RICHARD PETERS. They say it will be there within minutes.

Please let me know when you receive funds. Please advise the next steps.

Regards

Lister

I also sent this to the banks email address....

The first thing they're going to ask for is the questions and trace number that Western Union provide you with... I wonder how long it will be before they ask for it..

Best Regards,
Dr Ahmed Bello

Well it didn't take them long to respond...Five and a half hours...

Since it's the weekend I'll leave them waiting till Monday...

Friday 24th September

Ahmed,

Find attached the affidavit, and letter of administration as requested..

I’ve also visited the Western Union and transferred the $700 for the treasurer - OBINNA RICHARD PETERS. They say it will be there within minutes.

Please let me know when you receive funds. Please advise the next steps.

Regards

Lister

Regards,
Dr. Ahmed Bello.

Having just returned from a lovely long weekend away to find your two notes which I cannot understand ?

I transferred the money as requested - Please provide me with the Control Managers name and number and I’ll contact them and get this cleared up.

I await an urgent reply.

Regards

Lister..

Best Regards,
Dr. Bello

I’ve just tried call him, I keep getting busy signal.

I don’t like your manner and approach of calling one of your customers that they are playing you like a fool– I’ve a receipt in my wallet that says I transferred the money so my take is that I’ll have an apology from you before I give you the three items that you asked for.

I hate being treated this way by banks, remember I had the same issues with the banks attitude when we started this transaction – very unsatisfactory.

Awaiting your reply

Lister

I couldn't be bother calling him as I busy getting ready for the Team Saluki event

I can’t understand your explanation for the rudeness I experienced from you. You accepted that the information you had to hand was correct and accused me of being a liar – something I have and never will be. I’ve no idea what stress you’re on about – if you’ve got stress it must be self inflicted due to the manner in which you treat your customers.

On a different matter – I was looking for your banks website and can’t seem to locate it. I’ve tried various combination of standard trust bank but all have failed to come up with a bank website. Having seen some of the other websites and some mentions of standard trust I’m worried that all may not be what it seems. Please put my mind at rest and let me have your banks website address so I can confirm that all is well.

Regards

Lister

Ahmed Bello

Thank you for the website. I notice that it has a warning on there which request you to contact an email address for confirmation.

No disrespect to you – but I’ve sent off a note asking for confirmation who you are. If I get a note back from them I’ll happily provide the details you require.

Please accept my apologies for this small delay.

Regards

Lister

The bank looks legit enough, I've not sent off a note but have a look yourself. Looks valid enough...

It's at this point that it goes all quiet from their end...

2nd October 2004

Ahmed,

I’ve not yet had a response from the enquiries email I sent. Can you chase that section of the bank to respond to request for confirmation that you are who you say you are..

Thanks
Lister

I wonder if he's keen enough to get his hands on the money that he'll send an email himself...

2nd October 2004

Chris,

I’m still in discussions with the bank. I’ve asked them to verify who they are but I’ve not had a response from them. This is a copy of the letter I’ve
Sent to them. I’ve not had confirmation who he is – as soon as I get it I’ll release the information the bank require to complete the transaction.

Hope all is well..

Regards
Lister
-----Original Message-----
From: Lister Rimmer [mailto:enquiries@standardtrustbank.com]
Sent: 29th September 2004 10:34
To: enquiries@standardtrustbank.com
Subject: I need your urgent reply

Dear Sir / Madam,
I read with interest your scrolling banner on the website and would like confirmation of an employee of yours, His name is Ahmed Bello whom I’ve been dealing with in a transaction.

Can you provide confirmation of who he is.

By the way – I’ve found his attitude to be not very customer focused..

Thanks in advance…

Lister

I've sent him this to see if the two of them will try and send a dummy email saying all is well and apologising for his attitude.. I wonder...

Well I'm amazed - he didn't bite and it's went all quite from both parties...

I fire off a note to Ahmed at "the bank" to see if he'll respond...

Ahmed,

I got response from the bank – it seems you are out to scam me of money in something called a 419 Fraud.

Why would you do such a thing.. I have done nothing to you yet you wish to take my hard earned money for yourself.

Lister

If I get a response I'll post it here - I'll give them a couple of days then I'll post the email addys and telephone numbers for you to have fun yourself...